Neurosis as Self Preservation

Everyone is a Little Neurotic as that's Normal

New Approach to this Publication

I’ve noticed I have two audiences emerging; my subscribers and my followers. When I look at my list of subscribers, I mostly see five stars. This is how Substack’s algorithm rates subscribers. It knows when my newsletter has been successfully delivered to your inbox, when it’s been viewed, and how many times you’ve opened each message.

I deeply appreciate my readers and your enthusiasm for my content as most of you are reading my posts more than once! I suspect that’s also because my posts are long winded. Thank you for sticking around!

Then I have my followers who engage with my daily notes by “liking”, commenting, and restacking them.

So, I’ve decided to change my approach to see if I can reach my subscribers in the same meaningful way that I do with my followers by selecting one of my daily “notes” as my newsletter theme for that week. I may choose to only copy and paste the note without expanding on it or I may decide to add a little more to it. We’ll see - is a generator thing.

Generally speaking, my daily posts are of a personal experience to exemplify some mechanical nature of being human. Sometimes it’s related to Human Design. Other times, it’s not. I want my subscribers to benefit like my followers are from my other fields of knowledge and not just HD. If you aren’t using the Substack app, you’ll be missing these little gems.

Here’s my post from September 7th, 2024.

I’m always blown away by how evidence can be staring you in the face and yet you don’t see it. The doctor I studied under called this “mini-maxi-schizophrenia”.

Schizophrenia is a disease of the mind in that it distorts reality. You and I will see a fridge while a person with schizophrenia may see a person or they may not see the fridge at all.

Here’s the thing, we all have a little schizophrenia and that’s why the doctor I did my training with referred to it as being mini-maxi; in the sense that on an individual level, it’s a small thing, “mini”, but for that “thing” your perception is completely distorted, “maxi”.

It takes perfect timing to hear just the right phrase to break through that mental distortion.

I had that happen to me a couple of weeks ago when I went for a consultation in Traditional Chinese Medicine.

I am 2 years post-menopause and I feel my metabolism has slowed down so I was looking for a solution to help with my digestion and improve my weight.

I practice what I preach; my physical well-being is just as important to me as my mental and emotional well-being.

I live an active lifestyle - I walk or hike regularly and practice yoga. I go for weekly acupuncture and shiatsu massage treatments, alternating each week. I have a home spa, including a sauna, hot tub, cold tub, and swimming pool that I use regularly.

We were discussing my eating habits and he very casually said, “Well if that’s working for you.” It was a light bulb moment. Well, I was there because something wasn’t working! I haven’t been feeling good in my body, especially after eating. My appetite had gone down yet I’ve slowly gained weight.

I don’t believe in dieting. I believe in listening to your body.

What I had failed to see was how I had been conditioned from childhood away from doing that and I had taken on beliefs about what was correct for my body’s mechanics.

In Human Design the first pillar of our well-being and our ability to see correctly is our digestive system. If we don’t eat correctly, we also don’t take in information correctly.

I had failed to see how I had NEGLECTED my food intake. I have been following my HD in that I need to eat in a calm and quiet environment. I simply didn’t care what I ate as long as I ate and followed whatever I was in the mood for. But how was that working for me? Not well, as I still had these physical complaints.

Here’s my “mini-maxi-schizophrenia”: I take a lot of care when it comes to what my dog eats. High-quality dog food, and natural dog treats. I bake homemade dog treats as store-bought biscuits have sugar. I even buy 2 bags of dog food of the same Brand but in different flavors, because I felt bad for my dog to have to eat the same food twice a day for her entire life. How boring!

I didn’t see how I wasn’t doing the same for myself. Please laugh 😆 with me!

For most of my childhood home life, this was how I was conditioned. Food wasn’t important. There was no set meal time except at my grandmother’s. Bless her Soul. It didn’t matter what I ate just as long as I did. It’s not that there was a lack of food. There was an abundance of food, in fact, but not to my liking, and my food preferences weren’t considered.

In essence, I don’t know how to eat correctly. I have to throw out this pattern and admit, I don’t know what I don’t know because I was never taught correctly. So, I have found a yearlong coaching program that will teach me what I don’t know that is also tailored to me and what I do like to eat. I’m so excited about this new experiment as I level up in my self-care. I am already experiencing positive results.

The point of this story is, ask yourself, are there areas in your life, in your self-care, that you are NEGLECTING?

Neglect is self-deprivation. It’s a lack of care. But like me, you may not be aware you are doing this.

I felt I was taking care of my body but failed to see that my attention was on things outside of my body and not what I was taking in, my “mini-maxi-schizophrenia”.

Are you doing something similar?

Explore the life themes in the image below but I recommend focusing on one element at a time. Whatever you feel you need to prioritize and can commit to. Don’t try to overhaul everything at once. 🫶🏻

A Little More on This Subject

Mini-Maxi-Schizophrenia serves a purpose. It protects the individual from seeing a conflict they aren’t yet ready to deal with. A conflict is some life event that you lacked the ability to cope with at the time it occurred. The brain will keep it hidden from your awareness so that you can continue to function in life. It’s as if we have forgotten these traumatic events yet we haven’t because they impact our beliefs and our behaviors.

Coaches, counselors, and psychotherapists need to know this. This is why we can talk and talk and talk about an issue but never seem to get through to someone. They aren’t ready yet.

Everyone can benefit from knowing this survival mechanism of the brain if you’re dealing with someone you love and are attempting to help them SEE something that just doesn’t get through to them. It can be as big as a school bus to you but they just don’t see it. If you’re in that situation, maybe it’s better to just accept the person the way they are as you probably lack the skill to help them deal with what is hidden. Plus, it never feels good when someone is trying to “fix you”.

Please let me know if this new format is equally satisfying to you and if there is anything you’d like me to write about. Questions and comments are always welcome.

If you know someone who would like to receive my newsletter please share and let’s get the conversation started about Mental Health Matters so that no one ever feels alone.

Thanks again for your interest in Mental Health Matters and all the many ways you show your support by reading, subscribing, following, sharing, commenting, and posting your questions to me, Grace Dakini!

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Here’s a simple technique using the Wellness Wheel to see where you are neglecting yourself.

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If you’re new to my publication, remember to check out my other articles!

You’ll also find Human Design Resources with all the links you’ll need to start exploring your HD. I have recently updated this resource page. There is now a list of available books through Amazon related to the subjects I have covered.

This list is sure to grow!